Major Rawlings is a character - and no mistake. After spending most of his life gathering baubles for bravery in combat from Her Maj, Queen Liz 2, The Major is spending his latter years losing his marbles. Pining for battlefield entanglement and the thrill of leading men about the place, Rawlings takes his frustration out on hotel workers, video store clerks, receptionists and hoteliers throughout the land.

Who's on the line?! Major calling!

Disclaimer:
No one was harmed during the making of these phone calls. In the major's words: it's just a bit of bloody fun!